This was by far the hardest rankings I have had to do so far. Do you rank history before current teams success? How do you rank a cities passionate fan base for one sport with a lethargic second one? Which weighs more? Does success in the 70's and 80's for a cities teams mean more than a city whose teams weren't around then? The only possible solution is my random whims and I must have changed the order of 2-10 at least a dozen times. At least we have a #1 that can't be argued with, except by tools who think their teams are always the best no matter what. Well, I hope they see that they are not.
1. San Francisco (49er's & Giants): You cannot deny the 49er's 5 Super Bowl wins and the Giants history back to the New York days. You go to any mall in America and you will see some guy walking around in a satin Niners jacket, probably with toilet paper in a plastic bag. People were and still remain passionate about the 49ers and the same goes for the Giants as there are many fans around the country that still love Barry Bonds and think his head growth was due to SF's garlic fries. The Giants have the most wins in MLB history and the most Hall of Famer's (most of who still live in Barry Bonds skull). You have the legends, Montana, Rice, Mays, McCovey and Blue. Heck, you put those 5 together I think they can beat the Bobcats. You have the malcontents: TO and his calling his Playboy model dating QB gay, Coach Singletary and his motivational speeches involving dropping his pants, and well, TO again and after destroying this franchise, needed a new challenge and franchise to destroy. And, of course, you had Candlestick Park.
2. New Orleans (Saints & Hornets): This is where it started to get tricky and the start of my dizzying change of order. I gave New Orleans #2 because of the effects of Hurricane Katrina and 2 displaced franchises. The New Orleans teams now had fans all around the country and I think that has stuck, with such stars as Chris Paul and Drew Brees. I don't think there was a fan around the country who wasn't rooting for New Orleans to come back and thrive, well, except maybe Boston fans. Yes, there are some downfalls. When Archie Manning (and his devil-spawn)and the kicker with half a foot were your heroes to potential 1-15 teams, you tend to put bags over your heads when attending games. When you have an owner like Tom Benson who tried to use Katrina as a way to move the team to another city, you put a bag over his head, tightly. In the end though, New Orleans still have fans all over the country and I am one of them, even though they have Supreme Ruler of the Tools, Jeremy Shockey, on their team. But, none will beat there fans at the games.
3. Kansas City (Chiefs & Royals): This is where my first problem with passion for one team and, let's just say, not so much passion of the other came into play. But upon some research, there used to be a lot of passion for the Royals and I think it is still there. We have to start with the Chiefs though. They have the consecutive sellout record and their tailgates rival that of college Saturdays. They have many heroes, Len Dawson, Lamar Hunt, Derrick Thomas, Tony Gonzalez, and my favorite Christian Okoye to name a few. This is Chief country. But, in a Caddyshack way, the Royals are no slouch either with Brett, Saberhagen and Bo Jackson. It's just now they are tremendous slouches.
4. San Diego (Chargers & Padres): This may be where one of my favorite cities tilted the rankings a few spots, but I think it is justified. First of all, any city that Eli Manning doesn't want to be in, is a city I love. The Chargers have some solid history too. The sweet uniforms, Lance Alworth, Dan Fouts and a beard that needed its own zip code, Kellen Winslow, Junior Seau, LT and Gates. They also have Natrone Means and Marion Butts, Chuck Muncies spectacles, and Ryan Leaf, who probably wont be making any games outside of Texas for a long time. The Padres have some history too and a couple of World Series runs. Dave Winfield was drafted by four teams after college and I think he chose the right sport. Tony Gwynn is beloved in the SD area more than bikini girls on a 82 degree February day, well that might be overstating it. In the end, I think it is a passionate fan base, just with lots of other options of things to do.
5. Buffalo (Bills & Sabres): The Bills went to 4 straight Super Bowls, of course they lost them all, but still. I think if you look across America, they are the team that most fans root for in the NFC East due to their dislike of the Patriots, Dolphins and Jets and their fans/17-0 champagne swilling former players. Jim Kelly, Thurman Thomas, Bruce Smith and OJ Simpson are all model citizens. (Ahem...which one doesn't belong..lalala). The Sabres have been a solid NHL team for some time and once played a game in the fog due to the heat outside and during that same game, a player killed a bat. Cool. Cool enough to put them at number 5.
6. Cincinnati (Reds & Bengals): Hold your horses and let me explain. The Reds were established in 1882. 18 freakin' 82, one year after Dick Clark was born. Yes, the Bengals have had some trouble with the law, I call that interacting with their fans. The Big Red Machine was one of the most fearsome lineups ever and if you don't think so, Pete Rose will bet you. Currently, the teams are in a little disarray, but that doesn't take away from the fans passion for them. Until one of them calls OchoCinco, Chad Johnson and he stabs him. Once again, interacting with the fans.
7. New Jersey (Nets & Devils): Yes, I realize that New Jersey is not a City, its a Province. OK, not a province, but both teams are named New Jersey and I think the state is small enough that we can combine Newark and East Rutherford, we will call them NER. Umm, I think NER is passionate for these teams. One of them appeared as Puddy's favorite on Seinfeld. Good enough for me.
8. Seattle (Seahawks & Mariners): I feel for their loss with the Sonics, which should have never left as stated in my last post, but this was one that could have gone anywhere from 4-10 in my book. I think they love their teams but two things stick in my mind. The fans, who decided to retire the #12 in a tribute to, well themselves. "Hey, were the only team that roots for their team and it has gotten us to the Super Bowl once, let retire our number". Blech...get over yourselves. Two, an ownership that thought maybe it wasn't a good idea to keep Griffey, Johnson and A-Fraud (who could have just been A-Rod if he stayed here) after their best run in franchise history makes me think they will continue to do this once they get good.
9. Indianapolis (Colts & Pacers): Once you steal a team, and then root for that team like it was always yours, you get lowered on my list. (Please wait during this brief intermission and another commercial with Peyton Manning....la-ti-da....hmmm...hmmm...ok were back). The Colts do get credit for, well the Baltimore Colts do, being the first team with cheerleaders. (Oh, man, another Peyton commercial................). The Pacers had the one of my favorite sports moments ever in the Brawl at the Palace and finally putting some tool fans in their place. That along with Reggie Miller showing up Spike Lee and they are good in my book. Just get your team the right way.
10. Baltimore (Orioles & Ravens): This could be #2 to #4 on the list, but as stated above, don't steal a team, especially one with as much history as the Cleveland Browns and then pretend nothing happened. This city couldn't have two more polarizing heroes from their two teams. Cal Ripken Jr. and his bubble gum image and consecutive game streak, to Ray Lewis and his murders and consecutive times jumping on the pile pretending he made the tackle streak. Baltimore has a lot of history with Murray, Palmer, Boog, the Robinsons and, well the football team doesn't have any history. They should be higher, maybe over Indy.
11. Charlotte (Panthers and Bobcats): We start the two cities with very little history segment, which is why they are at the bottom. Charlotte gets the nod as the Panthers successes and the Bobcats, umm, what league do they play in again? OK, I put them ahead because of their cheerleaders being caught making out in a bar bathroom and having the courage to draft Rae Carruth.
12. Nashville (Titans and Predators): I loved the Oilers. Earl Campbell, Warren Moon and Bum Phillips. Those were the days and those were some sweet uniforms. But that was the Oilers and these are the Titans. There coach has one of the greatest mustaches ever, and when that's one of the best things you can say about a franchise, you cant be rated too high and need more time to move up the list. The Predators, bleaaach, NHL in the South turns me off more than a Rosie O'Donnell 3 hour "Comedy" special.
Wednesday, June 24, 2009
Friday, June 12, 2009
Sports Cities Rankings - Cities with 1 Team
We now rank cities that have one team, which gets a little easier, since well, they actually have a team to help with the rankings. One quick disclaimer: I did not include the Canadian cities that have only one team as the likelihood of them getting another team isn't very high and I was unable to convert to the metric system to figure out how many teams they each actually had. But, if I had to rank the Canadian cities with one team, it would be: Montreal, Vancouver, Edmonton, Calgary and then Ottawa. Commence complaining you greasy Canadians. Onto the US cities with one team (These rankings consider their current teams, the actual city itself and whether or not they deserve another team):
1. Portland (NBA-Trailblazers): There is a crazy mix going on here between the tree hugger's and the NBA, a match made, in well, probably only the mind of deranged film maker. Not only that, they survived the Jail Blazer years where there were multiple marijuana arrests, Qyntel Woods staging dog fights in his home (before it became cool. He was a trendsetter that Qyntel), had Ruben Patterson (a registered sex offender), Rasheed Wallace suspended for threatening a referee, fights and sucker punches at practice and last but not least Damon Stoudamire being found with a pound of marijuana in his home. It was like a day in the life of a Cincinnati Bengal. These guys knew how to party. Those days are over and now they are one of the best young teams in the NBA. The reasons they are #1 on this list is because Portland is an awesome city and it is the only city on this list that absolutely deserves another team, a baseball team. That would be a perfect fit.
2. Orlando (NBA-Magic): They have an up and coming team with some young stars. One downfall it their name though, seriously, The Magic, you can do better than that. It doesn't really strike fear in anyone, "Oh, you showed me the 7 of Hearts. Wow. Now please step aside while I dunk on you". The city also showed its resilience during the food shortage years when Shaq was on the team. Should they get another team? Maybe. I think a football team could survive here (even maybe Jacksonville's)
3. San Antonio (NBA-Spurs): Lets see: Championships, check. Likable superstar, check. Team name that fits the area of the country it resides in, check. Great city, check. The only negative I can find is that they employed Bruce Bowen, who made up for his lack of talent by his ability to physically assault another player 18 times per possession. But the NBA calls that Defensive Player of the Year, though when someone breathes on Kobe, its a foul. That's why I don't like the NBA. Does San Antonio deserve another team? I don't think so. The logical one would be baseball, but as I stated in my last rankings, I think if Texas were to get another team, I would like it to be Austin.
4. Jacksonville (NFL-Jaguars): You probably are wondering why I would list them at 4 when I mentioned earlier that maybe this team would be better in Orlando. Well, my defense is: I don't know what you are talking about. Prove it. But, it is a good football city with passionate fans that can really get behind WR's who do coke in their cars in a super market parking lot. Do I think they should move, No. But if they moved, I would like it to be to Orlando. It makes sense in this economy and this short distance would cut down on moving costs. You wouldn't even need to hire a moving company, they could just gather everyone together for a weekend and make 23,402 trips using their current vehicles. Another team? No Way.
5. Columbus (NHL-Blue Jackets): The one thing I know about the NHL is that I don't know much about the NHL. This seems to be a good fit. A cold weather city with a high population. Perfect getting an NHL team so there wouldn't be any competing teams from Cincinnati or Cleveland. And to top it off, a rather bored population that is looking for something, anything, to do as evidenced by their 3,287 page long Wikipedia page about their city. Another team? No Way.
6. Salt Lake City (NBA-Jazz): Many people probably think they are too low on this list and that may be, as they have a winning franchise that is competitive every year. But they have two major strikes against them. One, they never changed their name after moving from New Orleans. Change it to anything, even that stupid Olympic mascot you had, but Salt Lake is so far removed from Jazz, it compares to Travis Henry and one of his kids in terms of how far removed it is. Second, is the, umm, shall we say the powdered sugar look to there teams. Even their black guys either look white (Deron Williams), or act white (Cowboy Lovin' Karl Malone). It is quite obvious. Should they have another team? I think another team could survive here, as long as it is an predominately white sport such as hockey, lacrosse or polo.
7. San Jose (NHL-Sharks): I will admit, I know nothing about San Jose or the Sharks, but they seem to have pretty good teams each year. Get knocked for having a hockey team in a city that hits 100 degrees regularly in the summer. Another team? Nope.
8. Sacramento (NBA-Kings): They are a fine fit for the city. But they take a major hit for employing a player who was only allowed to look at his wife the whole game thus causing 36 turnovers a half (Doug Christie). Another team: No.
9. Memphis (NBA-Grizzlies): Normally would be last on this list, but you will see why in a moment. Another team that needs to change its name from its original cities name as I am pretty sure grizzly bears are not very common in Memphis. Horrible team, horrible owner and horrible GM. That about says it. Another team: Nope.
10. Oklahoma City (NBA-Thunder): First I will say that this has nothing to do with the city and its ability to have a team, it has shown it can. But I can not support how they got their team. They basically lied, cheated, stole, back stabbed and swindled an entire city to steal their team and I can not condone that. Not the right way to go about getting a team (and from a great sports city such as Seattle, who to their credit, would not put up with the completely ridiculous and underhanded demands of their dickhead owner). Clay Bennett is one of the lowest forms of human beings. And that is why they are last.
1. Portland (NBA-Trailblazers): There is a crazy mix going on here between the tree hugger's and the NBA, a match made, in well, probably only the mind of deranged film maker. Not only that, they survived the Jail Blazer years where there were multiple marijuana arrests, Qyntel Woods staging dog fights in his home (before it became cool. He was a trendsetter that Qyntel), had Ruben Patterson (a registered sex offender), Rasheed Wallace suspended for threatening a referee, fights and sucker punches at practice and last but not least Damon Stoudamire being found with a pound of marijuana in his home. It was like a day in the life of a Cincinnati Bengal. These guys knew how to party. Those days are over and now they are one of the best young teams in the NBA. The reasons they are #1 on this list is because Portland is an awesome city and it is the only city on this list that absolutely deserves another team, a baseball team. That would be a perfect fit.
2. Orlando (NBA-Magic): They have an up and coming team with some young stars. One downfall it their name though, seriously, The Magic, you can do better than that. It doesn't really strike fear in anyone, "Oh, you showed me the 7 of Hearts. Wow. Now please step aside while I dunk on you". The city also showed its resilience during the food shortage years when Shaq was on the team. Should they get another team? Maybe. I think a football team could survive here (even maybe Jacksonville's)
3. San Antonio (NBA-Spurs): Lets see: Championships, check. Likable superstar, check. Team name that fits the area of the country it resides in, check. Great city, check. The only negative I can find is that they employed Bruce Bowen, who made up for his lack of talent by his ability to physically assault another player 18 times per possession. But the NBA calls that Defensive Player of the Year, though when someone breathes on Kobe, its a foul. That's why I don't like the NBA. Does San Antonio deserve another team? I don't think so. The logical one would be baseball, but as I stated in my last rankings, I think if Texas were to get another team, I would like it to be Austin.
4. Jacksonville (NFL-Jaguars): You probably are wondering why I would list them at 4 when I mentioned earlier that maybe this team would be better in Orlando. Well, my defense is: I don't know what you are talking about. Prove it. But, it is a good football city with passionate fans that can really get behind WR's who do coke in their cars in a super market parking lot. Do I think they should move, No. But if they moved, I would like it to be to Orlando. It makes sense in this economy and this short distance would cut down on moving costs. You wouldn't even need to hire a moving company, they could just gather everyone together for a weekend and make 23,402 trips using their current vehicles. Another team? No Way.
5. Columbus (NHL-Blue Jackets): The one thing I know about the NHL is that I don't know much about the NHL. This seems to be a good fit. A cold weather city with a high population. Perfect getting an NHL team so there wouldn't be any competing teams from Cincinnati or Cleveland. And to top it off, a rather bored population that is looking for something, anything, to do as evidenced by their 3,287 page long Wikipedia page about their city. Another team? No Way.
6. Salt Lake City (NBA-Jazz): Many people probably think they are too low on this list and that may be, as they have a winning franchise that is competitive every year. But they have two major strikes against them. One, they never changed their name after moving from New Orleans. Change it to anything, even that stupid Olympic mascot you had, but Salt Lake is so far removed from Jazz, it compares to Travis Henry and one of his kids in terms of how far removed it is. Second, is the, umm, shall we say the powdered sugar look to there teams. Even their black guys either look white (Deron Williams), or act white (Cowboy Lovin' Karl Malone). It is quite obvious. Should they have another team? I think another team could survive here, as long as it is an predominately white sport such as hockey, lacrosse or polo.
7. San Jose (NHL-Sharks): I will admit, I know nothing about San Jose or the Sharks, but they seem to have pretty good teams each year. Get knocked for having a hockey team in a city that hits 100 degrees regularly in the summer. Another team? Nope.
8. Sacramento (NBA-Kings): They are a fine fit for the city. But they take a major hit for employing a player who was only allowed to look at his wife the whole game thus causing 36 turnovers a half (Doug Christie). Another team: No.
9. Memphis (NBA-Grizzlies): Normally would be last on this list, but you will see why in a moment. Another team that needs to change its name from its original cities name as I am pretty sure grizzly bears are not very common in Memphis. Horrible team, horrible owner and horrible GM. That about says it. Another team: Nope.
10. Oklahoma City (NBA-Thunder): First I will say that this has nothing to do with the city and its ability to have a team, it has shown it can. But I can not support how they got their team. They basically lied, cheated, stole, back stabbed and swindled an entire city to steal their team and I can not condone that. Not the right way to go about getting a team (and from a great sports city such as Seattle, who to their credit, would not put up with the completely ridiculous and underhanded demands of their dickhead owner). Clay Bennett is one of the lowest forms of human beings. And that is why they are last.
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