Friday, August 21, 2009

Fantasy Football WR Rankings

These will be a little shorter blurbs about each player since I am going 30 deep with these rankings. With WR's, it gets more into a grey area with each one you rank as there is a lot of other factors that related to WR's and to a lesser extent, TE's. But here we go:

1. Larry Fitzgerald (AZ): Is clearly the #1 WR on the list. This is even if Mr. "Haven't Missed a Party since I was a Freshman in High School" somehow takes over at QB".

2. Andre Johnson (Hou): Averaged almost 100 yds a game receiving last year, even with Sage (and I like Sage) as your QB. I will take that every week.

3. Randy Moss (NE): Everyone knows about his talent, no one knows about his desire, well other than his desire to look foolish quite a bit. Brady is back, and we know what he did last time with Brady at QB.

4. Steve Smith (Car): Didn't catch as many TD's last year but the yards and looks were there. Barring any unforeseen (or actually foreseen) attacks on teammates, he should be a top 5 WR.

5. Calvin Johnson (Det): An 0-16 team starting either a rookie QB or the nursing home version of Daunte Culpepper drops him a few notches even if he is the 2nd most talented WR in the league.

6. Roddy White (Atl): Had 1382 yds last season and 7 TD's without absolutely no help in the WR or TE corps. Add Tony Gonzalez into the equations along with an up and coming QB and one of the best running games in the league, and I think all his numbers increase.

7. Greg Jennings (GB): Each year, he has the quietest really good stats of any FF WR. Has a really good QB that hasn't caused any distractions in the past year by retiring and unretiring every 8 minutes.

8. Reggie Wayne (Ind): As long as he is able to remember all 642 audibles that Peyton uses each drive, he should be solid. No more Harrison and a solid Gonzalez and Clark among the receiving corps.

9. Marques Colston (NO): Drew Brees likes to throw the ball, really likes to throw the ball, so you have to have a Saint in your top ten. Colston missed basically 6 1/2 games last year and still put up some good stats when he was healthy, so I think he breaks from the pack as their top WR.

10. Bernard Berrian (MN): Let's just say he had a good year last year with Gus and T-Jack as his QB. I believe Grey Beard and Sage are upgrades.

11. TJ Houshmanzadeh (Sea): Moving from Cincinnati to Seattle is a huge upgrade especially since the Seahawks were devastated by injuries last year. Now assuming everyone stays healthy for the first time since Jim Zorn and Curt Warner were roaming the sidelines, I see a huge year from him.

12. Anquan Boldin (AZ): The first #2 receiver to join this list, but he really isn't a #2 receiver. More like a #5 receiver if you look at how he is being paid.

13. Lee Evans (Buff): This may be a shock to anyone reading this, but Evan's stats were somewhat comparable to TO last year. Now with defense's still thinking TO is an elite receiver, for whatever reason, I think it opens things up for Evans.

14. Vincent Jackson (SD): He quietly had over 1000 yds last year and 7 TD's. Has a great starting QB and plays 6 games against the ghost's of their former pasts: The Bronco's, Raider's and Cheif's. This is my sleeper #2 WR.

15. Lavernues Coles (Cin): Henry and their new kicker have been mentioned as being the primary beneficiaries of having Palmer back (Carson, not Jordan) but I have a hunch it will be Coles. I am pretty sure they will need to throw the ball, a lot.

16. DeSean Jackson (Phil): Rumor has it he spent the whole off season taking college level courses on where the goal line is and when it is OK to drop the ball while running past it. I like this offense, should put up big numbers.

17. Antonio Bryant (TB): Had huge numbers last year but I have no idea who is throwing to him and I don't like the options available. Also, lets throw a malcontent TE into the mix. TB is the one team that could be 4-12 or 12-4 and it wouldn't surprise me.

18. Dwayne Bowe: (KC): An obvious talent, but has started the season in the doghouse, so it drops him a few notches. And since Todd Haley put his best player in the doghouse, it is going to need 52 rooms by the end of the preseason.

19. Wes Welker (NE): You cannot deny the hands on someone who is somehow able to catch 111 passes from Matt Cassel in a year when if you tally up all of his completed passes in games in his career, to get to 111, you might have to go back to middle school.

20. Santonio Holmes (Pit): It is known that the Steelers will be good. But for fantasy purposes, they haven't been that great. Holmes should be solid as long as he doesn't take the route of the last WR to catch a game winning Super Bowl TD. Seriously, if your going to wear sweatpants, put the safety on, everyone knows that.

21. Braylon Edwards (Cle): Not sold on Cleveland's offense at all. If fact, they may have a game where they have negative yards. But he is really their only threat, so he should get some numbers as a #2-3 WR on your roster. (Wow, I just typed something about the Browns without making a joke about Brady Quinn, I am evolving as a writer)

22. Terrell Owens (Buff): Has made the worst off season decisions of anyone I have ever seen. The Superstars, The TO Show, Buffalo? This is a guy starving for attention that needs to realize that he can get that attention by dedicating his off season to learning the art of catching a football.

23. Kevin Walter (Hou): As you have seen by my rankings, I am kinda huge on the Houston offense. Walter has his QB back, Slaton at RB and Johnson and Daniels keeping him from double teams. I like his chances.

24. Eddie Royal (Den): Someone has to do something in this offense that will be down by 20 every game. I bet its Royal.

25. Santana Moss (Wash): In all honesty, should maybe be a little bit higher as he is a #1 receiver. My guess though is Dan Snyder somehow gets in his way, whether it be trading for a bigger name, less talented WR or by physically injuring him since he isn't brash enough.

26. Anthony Gonzalez (Indy): The Colts will pass enough to spread it around and he has shown enough to consider him as your #3 WR or if you inexplicably play in a 26 team league, a #1 WR.

27. Brandon Marshall (Den (for now)): My favorite quote of the year: "I am not even close to learning the playbook". And it was said this week. Tremendous talent. Tremendous moron.

28. Roy Williams (Dal): Could be a good sleeper at this level. If he continues to focus his efforts on improving and not exposing the Romo-Witten love affair, he could be good.

29. Jericho Cotchery (NYJ): Lost his gunslinger as a QB where it didn't matter if he ran the route as the ball would end up 20 yards from him and he would have to go get it and his WR mate. Still, he is basically their only option in the passing game.

30. Chad Ochocinco (Cin): It hurts me just to type that last name. Should be better this year with Carson back and should recover from being a 3rd round draft pick in Fantasy Football last year and being dropped by week 3 and not being picked up again. My guess is he won't be dropped this year.

The next 15 (In no particular order): These could replace any of the last 6-7 depending on your gut feelings: Devin Hester, Steve Breaston, Percy Harvin, Ted Ginn Jr, Derrick Mason, Chris Henry, Donald Driver, Lance Moore, Dominek Hixon, Jeremy Maclin, Hines Ward, Josh Morgan, Donnie Avery, Justin Gage, & Mushin Mohammed.

TE, K and DEF/ST to go.

Tuesday, August 18, 2009

The Toughest Jobs in Sports

Before we get to my WR rankings, I was watching the PGA Championship this weekend, it got me thinking, what are the toughest jobs in sports. This could be on the field or off the field, as long as it is related to sports. And to lead things off, what started this whole process:

1. Golf Cameraman: You are basically asked to follow a 2-inch orb travelling at over 100 miles per hours. Sure the guys next to green recording the putts have it pretty easy "Hmmm, let me set the camera down in the line of the putt and go grab a hot dog", but the cameramen who have to record shots off the tee have it extremely difficult. Can you imagine the guy who loses Tiger Woods ball on any of his shots? I am pretty sure the network would have you shot, that is a lot of pressure, especially if it ends up being a hole in one, you might be hanged in a public forum.

2. Agent for an NFL Wide Receiver: They are the Diva's of any sport. They are like the first born child after another one is born...craving attention as they are not involved in every play. Sure we have the high profile guys like TO, Randy Moss and Chad Nobody O'Cinco, but you don't have to be good to be a diva. Prime examples are Freddie Mitchell and Chris Henry. Their thought process must go something like this "Hmmm, my actions on the field aren't getting me on TV, maybe I should do something illegal or make outrageous claims that will get me on TV, rather than practice". And these agents, who I normally despise, have to put up with them and defend them, not an easy job.

3. Umpires: I am not talking about the guys patrolling 1st, 2nd or 3rd base. But the guy behind the plate. On any close pitch, if you call it a strike, one team and fans hate you. If you call it a ball, the other teams hates you. Basically you are hated no matter what you do. I am pretty sure if I was an umpire, I would probably throw 30 people out each game, including fans. Or just call everything a strike to get the game over with sooner.

4. Marketing Director for the NHL: The NHL has fallen off the map in terms of major sports, I actually think soccer has passed it. How can you market this in the US? "Well, we are probably on Channel 2385 of your cable providers channel listing. And if you get a degree in the letter V, you might know some of the players." In all honesty, there are very few American players left in a sport trying to make it in America. This would be like trying to send a bunch of American bowlers from the PBA over to Laos...well, that would have a better chance of succeeding as bowlers are known for their outgoing personalities.

5. NBA Referees: It has to be difficult to remember which team you are suppose to call the fouls on each game.

6. Any basketball player who loves to play basketball and has to play with Kobe Bryant: It has to be difficult, to love the game of basketball and know that there is only a 0.007% chance you will see the ball on any possession. For those that voted for him for MVP, do you not watch the games? He is MSP - Most Selfish Player. He would rather go 1 on 5 than pass the ball to a teammate. This is why I stopped watching the NBA and watch College Basketball.

7. Long Snapper: You have one job and if you mess up...it is shown over and over again. Plus you get mauled by the other team as they think "Hmmm, this guy has other things to worry about, maybe I will beat him after the snap."

8. Beer salesman in the lower section of Yankee Stadium: "Umm, anyone here...anyone? Ohh there is someone, you want a Martini, shaken not stirred...OK, let me go get that guy."

Wednesday, August 12, 2009

Fantasy Football Preview - The RB's

RB's are the most difficult to project. You have time shares in the backfield, guys who seem to always get injured, guys who had a strong run at the end of last year, and of course, New England and Denver starting 14 running backs a year. Here are my rankings based on gut feelings and research...a lot of the earlier.

1. Adrian Peterson (MN): Is he the best running back in the NFL? Yes. Is he the best running back in the NFL for fantasy purposes? That is up for debate. But I am taking the guy who can break off a 70 yard run on 3rd and 4, when I am down by 12 points in my fantasy match up on Monday night in the 4th quarter.

2. Michael Turner (Atl): I think there is some regression here. They have to run Norwood and his 5.4 ypc, he had somewhere near 6438 carries last year and this is his second year as a feature back. But, they have added Gonzalez to take off some of the pressure and that should open some lanes.

3. Steve Slaton (Hou): This is my first leap of faith. 4.8 ypc and 1200 yds in his rookie season along with 50 receptions and he gets his starting QB back. To top it off he has no competition at RB. Seriously, I think they have 4 hobo's and Gary Coleman competing with him. Big year here.

4. Maurice Jones-Drew (Jack): I normally don't trust people with hyphenated last names (yes I am looking at you Courtney Thorne-Smith) but I believe in MJD - Fred Taylor. Skip the criticism about his height...he has performed well at this height for many years. Scouts are idiots with too many charts.

5. Brandon Jacobs (NYG): Is a beast and no longer has Derrick Ward. As long as Elisha doesn't camp out in the backfield playing with his Barbie's before he hands Jacobs the ball, he should be a stud #1 fantasy RB.

6. Frank Gore (SF): The only question is will they run after they are down by 14 in the first 10 minutes. But Gore gets his yards and is a beast. He is also motivated by not having to see his coach drop his pants at halftime, and trust me, that is a big motivation.

7. LaDianian Tomlinson (SD): What are you kidding me? LT at #7? Yep, I don't trust him anymore. He had 3.8 ypc last year. Reggie Bush had the same average. But he is still LT and Stay Classy San Diego, so he gets #7 on this list.

8. Chris Johnson (TN): The first back with a true dual back situation but you can't deny the fact that his 3rd string QB thinks himself to be a hall of famer so he must think he is a tunnel of celebriter...or something like that. Good team, good running game, he will be fine.

9. DeAngelo Williams (Car): Had 18 rushing TD's last year. His only strike is his counterpart in the backfield had 10. And only 13 of those were from them stealing the ball after a Delhomme interception.

10. Clinton Portis (Wash): Never been a huge fan until I realized that he has 8 personalities and that just has to confuse a defense when he comes out in a Toga. He always has stats though and with that passing game, they are going to need all 8 of them.

11. Derrick Ward (TB): Had 1000 yds last year as a #2 back. His competition is Earnest Graham and Omni Hatchback Williams. Enough said.

12. Matt Forte (Chi): I am not sold yet. He had a good year last year and now has a QB that doesn't resemble a drifter, only a surfer, which is an upgrade. Don't want him as my #1 RB.

13. Brian Westbrook (Phil): I think he just injured a calf while i was typing this, and not the animal type, that would be more up Tom Brady's line of work. His injuries are more frequent than Rosie O'Donnell's requests to the networks to do anything, anything on TV again (Seriously, I make people laugh...ok, person, laugh). Plus he has a hot shot rookie looking for carries.

14. Stephan Jackson (Stl): This ranking has nothing to do with his talent, he is a top 5 talent. It has more to do with the fact that I don't believe there is anyone on his offense that hasn't spent a significant amount of time in the Arena Football League.

15. Thomas Jones (NYJ): I have never been a big believer in Jones but last year he proved me wrong, for the first time in 7 years. The Jets have to run since they lost that frisky young gunslinger for a QB from last year.

16. Ryan Grant (GB): In all honesty, he should be higher, I just couldn't find a space for him. GB offense will be good. Oh wait, that's right...he went to Notre Dame...he could suck.

17. Donald Brown (Ind): Indy is going to have a good RB this year and I know it is not named Addai. Brown should flourish in Peyton's offense and be a strong rookie of the year candidate. And if he is not, I am sure the Manning family will have him properly disposed of.

18. MarShawn Lynch (Buff): Would be higher if it weren't for that crazy Roger Goodell and his whole against players committing crimes thing. If you take him as your #2, make sure to grab a #3 for the first 3 weeks. "Hey watch my show in VH1, it is totally real, not scripted at all, here let me do some sit ups for you....uggh...arggh"...ok got the microphone back from TO.

19. Darren McFadden (Oak): Another hunch here. Think he is going to try and pad his stats so he can somehow get out of Oakland. What he doesn't realize though is that he works for the undead. You can't escape them, I have tried.

20. Ronnie Brown (Mia): Little known fact is that the Wildcat was dreamed up in Laos by Ricky Williams. Good for 1000 yds and 8 tds. Not Ricky Williams mind you. I repeat, not Ricky Williams

Next Five: Marion Barber (too much competition for touches that don't include Jessica Simpson), Willis McGahee (inconsistent), Pierre Thomas (Reggie - No Talent Clown = Better Year From Him), LenDale White (Lost 30 pounds by not drinking tequila, who would have known), Larry Johnson (Larry is too lazy to write why.)

Dont Even Think About (until your 3rd RB): Hightower/Wells, Cedric Benson, Joseph Addai, Julius Jones

Other good Sleepers (Non Rookie): Jamal Lewis (no competition), The Denver or NE RB (if you know who is starting at draft time, move them up this list now, ....no seriously, now), Kevin Smith, Reggie Bush (could be a breakout year, like last year or the year before, just ask someone at his house in So Cal.), Parker/Mendenhall (I think Parker is done, and who hasn't needed a good Mendenhall for a sore throat), Darren "Verne Troyer" Sproles, Jonathan Stewart, Jerious Norwood.

The Rookies (In Order): Donald Brown, Knowshon Moreno, Lesean McCoy, Shonn Greene, Glen Coffee, Ian Johnson

Handcuffs: Ray Rice, Choice/Jones (in that order for Dallas), No call on the NE/Den handcuffs, Maurice Morris, Ricky Williams, Ahmad Bradshaw, Leon Washington, Fargus/Bush (in that order for Oakland), Ladell Betts, Graham/Williams (in that order for TB).

Next up the WR...which should be interesting

Tuesday, August 4, 2009

An Open Letter To My Daughter

I visited the Minnesota Vikings training camp today and was going to write about that experience, but as I was leaving, what I saw I couldn't believe. The whole way home, I wrote this in my mind, while shedding a few tears, I hope it comes out ok.

Dear Sweet Little Girl,

Today I went to my favorite football team, The Minnesota Vikings, training camp. I watched my favorite athletes run, catch and throw and it got me excited for the new season of football that is about to start.

As I left the field I was shocked, and I promise I will never do this to you. I saw fathers telling their kids to ask for items like wristbands, jerseys and gloves that the players used during practice. They used their kids as pawns so they could sell the items on something called ebay.

See, you are a 4 month old girl and just discovering the wonderful things in life like your feet and rolling on your tummy. You have yet to experience sports but when you do, if you don't like them, that's ok.

I want you to experience everything in life, so I will take you to a Vikings training camp. If you want to sit and watch the punter punt balls and say to daddy "See how high that one went?", we can do that all day. If you want to watch the players running around running plays, we can do that all day. If you want to see the players close up, daddy will lift you high on his shoulders so you can see them as they leave the field, not asking you to get him an autograph.

See, if we go to a game or training camp and you don't like football or baseball, that's OK. I got to spend a day with my little girl and we will find something else you love to do. If that's dancing, daddy will be at every recital. If its soccer, daddy will play with you in the back yard all night until your bedtime. If it is painting, he will put everything you ever paint on the fridge or wall. If it is writing, he will read every word you write.

See, I am here to introduce you to things, and you decide which ones you like, and daddy will be there to support you the whole way. If a Vikings game is on and you have a recital, well you know daddy is going to be watching you dance your feet off and smiling the whole time.

I will show you the Vikings and the Twins but in the end I want you to love what you love to do, not what I love to do.

And, if someday down the road, 20 years later, you decide to watch the Twins or Vikings on Sunday with your dad, well that will be the best day of my life. Well, other than the day you were born, my sweet little girl.

Dad