Fantasy Football AFC North Preview

Alright, this is the second of 8 installments breaking each team’s fantasy sleepers, busts and a former player/fantasy stud that they wish they still had and you wish was still playing. We will now move onto the AFC North:

Baltimore: Baltimore has always been offensively challenge and back in the day when Kyle Boller was starter, mentally challenged. But this year could be historical. In researching the Ravens, I saw that on the Depth Chart, they will not be starting a Left Tackle. This might make things difficult on their running plays, their passing plays and their most often used, punting plays. Then again Brian Billick is their coach and we really shouldn't challenge his “genius”, I mean should.

Sleeper: Mark Clayton - Some may question this choice by saying that his last good year was 1985 and his QB was Dan Marino. Now it is 22 years later and he has McNair as his QB. Both good points, but I picked him as a sleeper because he is old and probably takes a lot of naps.

Bust: Willis McGahee - I just think this guy has to be devastated. He played college at Miami, where there are girls in bikini's 365 days a year. Then he gets drafted by Buffalo, where i think the girls officially take their parkas off for a 48 hour period each year sometime around August 12th. And now he is traded to Baltimore, where the girls do wear less, but you can't tell if they are actually girls due to the heavy facial hair.

Former Player: Ray Lewis - What this defense could have been if he hadn't committed that double murder a few years back. He could reach the opposing runner and jumped on the pile 6 seconds after his teammates tackled him and started a dance like Mark Madsen being tasered, instead of the current 12 seconds.

Cincinnati: What does the city of Cincinnati need the most? Some of you may say a championship. I say a freaking Art School. First, they had the helmets with "BENGALS" spelled in Times New Roman, what you couldn't get a little creative and go with some Century Gothic? Now they have a helmet that looks like the gave a 10-month old that hasn't quite learned to sit up yet a paint brush and put a helmet by him. And don't get me started on the team name of Reds. Old Guys, "Uhhh, what should we name our baseball franchise?" Some dude in the corner doing a crossword puzzle, "Yes! 35-Across, Reds!". Old Guys, "That works, where are the hookers?"

Sleeper: Ocho Cinco - I started my search for a sleeper by perusing their rosters and trying to find a player that isn't incarcerated, suspended, have a warrant out for his arrest, or is currently drunk and leaving the bar. When that was unsuccessful, I read some stories and found this name. Not sure who he is, but he may be the only guy on the team, so i think he has a good shot of getting you at least 10yds and 1 point this year.

Bust: Chris Henry - Maybe its just me but i cant imagine him duplicating his 36 catches, 605 yards and 9 TD's from last season.

Former Player: Stanley Wilson - Seriously which current Bengal didn't have his poster on their wall while growing up? He was everything they wanted in a hero. Lying (he told coaches he forgot his playbook in his hotel room the night before the Super Bowl), Drugs (instead he went back and did enough cocaine to make Lindsay Lohan jealous) and Hiding from the Authorities (he was found later hiding in his shower).

Cleveland: Just one thing. The Dawgpound should really be involved somehow in Vick's sentence.

Sleeper: Syndric Steptoe - Now you may argue that he is somewhere in the 9-10 range on the WR depth chart. Actually, I believe their starting punter is #8 on the depth chart at WR. But with a name like Steptoe, how can he not have been groomed to be a WR who can catch passes along the sidelines? Pretty week argument you say, yeah your probably right.

Bust: Brandy Quinn - Let's see, he led Notre Dame to 3 straight Bowl game blowout loses, got passed over more times in the draft than a non-alcoholic drink in Britney Spears cooler, and he is named Brandy.

Former Player: Bernie Kosar - If only to see him try to reclaim his youth by going out to the bars with Brandy trying to pick up chicks 25 years younger than him with his curly mullet and lines like "I knew Ernest Byner"

Pittsburgh: They are the only team so far that hasn't listed their depth chart online. Now you can view this as they don't want to give away any secrets to their opponents or you can view it as i do, they have no depth.

Sleeper: Gary Russell - If he can quadruple his effort of attending his college general classes Intro to Pencils and Health 101 - Common Cheerleader Diseases at Minnesota, and then quadruple that effort (Octduple i believe, see i used Trig after high school), he might make the practice squad.

Bust: Najeh Davenport - Some people are saying that he is going to steal some TD's from Fast Willie Parker this season. I say you shouldn't draft this crappy player, you will dump him after 2 weeks like dropping the kids off at the pool. And that's the Shi*.

Former Player: Terry Bradshaw - If only to stop him from being involved in my Sunday mornings. He is like Beer Goggles. Your having a great time Saturday night. Wake up Sunday, feel for the remote while still bleary eyed, hit the On button...now i ask you, what is the difference between Terry Bradshaw screaming into your hangover or having the TV light shine on the thing you brought home last night from the bar? I wish James Brown would have ate him when he had the chance.

So there is the AFC North, hope the insight helps. Next up: AFC South