Billy Packer's take on Historical Events

As well reported over the past day, Billy Packer is a huge Duke homer. Now whether or not he is carrying Coach K's love child or not, has not been determined. His comments on the Gerald Henderson smackdown of Tyler Hansbrough, shows that he has no business calling a college basketball game, let alone a 3rd grade pee-wee game at your local gym. I have been able to uncover some of his comments on other events in history:

Kennedy Assasination: "The shooter was absolutely not intentionally going for the President's head. You can see that he was definately aiming for a squirrel in the park, that was not intentional at all."

Enron Scandal: "The CEO and the rest of the board were definately acting in the best interests of their employees and the stockholders. They didnt intentionally try to hurt anyone, the money they recieved by frauding America, they didnt want, they derserve."

OJ Simpson: "He definately didnt do it! He is the greatest running back ever and there is no way he would do something like this. I think AC was in the car blocking for him as they try to avoid police. The real victim here is OJ, his movie career is pretty much over. I was hoping for another Naked Gun"

Brittney Spears Career: "She is doing everything she needs to do to get back on track. You need to marry a few times before you get it right. And shaving her head will only give her more speed when she is driving to the basket. What? She doesnt play basketball, well she should. Only if she plays with Duke, Duke should be allowed to play 30 players at a time. They are that good."

Apollo 13: "There is no way they should have been up in space without a Duke grad on board. These Harvard & Yale graduates cant perform a simple task such as space travel. I am telling you if there was a Duke grad on board they would have been having a party on the moon like no other party."

Christian Laettner's famous final shot: "Ooooohhhhhh!! I need a cigarette"

Actually you are lucky as you will get 2 posts today, ok, maybe your unlucky.